Never That November

Heaven seems to sense my mood and sends the rain to imitate my tears.

If I shed just one for every thought of them I'd cry for a thousand years.

Time has passed and failed to heal my wounds. I wonder if it forgot me...?

Pain is as fresh as the day it first came and sorrow threatens to stop me.

Grief...depression, the line is a blur. How am I supposed to know?

If one is deep and the other deeper, and I feel as low as I can go?

Where happiness was, sadness reigns. Where dreams happened, nightmares lay claim.

My eyes close and see the pain. No escape from myself or yesterday's stain.

So scared to forget, tormenting to remember.

So many things to be thankful for, but never that November.

I couldn't help her. Couldn't hold their hands.

Ease their suffering. Stop him before it began.

Couldn't say goodbye. Couldn't hug one more time.

Couldn't see it coming. I feel so blind.

Didn't even know it happened. Shouldn't I have known?

Felt the agony she did, when their breath had flown?

I couldn't take their place. Couldn't help them at all.

Forced to standby, as hate made them fall.

So scared to forget, tormenting to remember.

So many things to be thankful for, but never that November.

Wrap my arms around myself, to hold the pain in.

Scared to let go, as by doing so, sorrow will win.

So consuming, far reaching, and powerful it feels.

How many times can a wounded soul heal?

Every thought tears me, just a little bit more.

Every memory makes my heart hit the floor.

Happy ones, sad ones, it is all the same.

Because yesterday has ended, tomorrow has abstained.

So scared to forget, tormenting to remember.

So many things to be thankful for, but never that November.